On the roller coaster! Seriously, the past couple of weeks have been flingy and all over the map.
I was depressed for a few days. Today driving into town to go to work I was elated for no particular reason. I also observed a total lack of social filter today and was a raving smart ass dick to a couple people that annoy me at work. Well one chick is a cashier and is generally a rude little bitch, so I can't be totally blamed for that one.
Bah. At any rate, it doesn't really matter.
So I'm on this thing to lose some weight. Yes there are those dudes that like a girl with a butt (thank you J Lopez, Beyonce, and the Kardashian family for making this shit popular). I am not such a big fan of the junk in my trunk. Therefore I am going to remove some of it and firm up the rest. I am tired of hating my body, I am tired of walking around in my body and hating my body, I am tired of having sex and hating my body, and I am tired of taking showers and hating my body.
Be the change you wish to see. It's my choice, I can sit on the sidelines and wish to be thinner, or I can actually do something about it. I'm going with the second option.
I might even keep track of my progress on here. Maybe. If I remember! I have a food app on my iPhone to log my eating stuffs, and fitness app to do log my workouts in. The problem I am facing is the part where I have to *start* going to the gym. I need a pre-gym. I use the gym on campus so I am generally surrounded by 18-22 year olds that have hung on to their teenage figure. Next to them, I feel worser. Yes, worser is a word. So I need to grow a pair and just do it. I may make tomorrow my first day. I have my neurosci class and then NOTHING, and this NOTHING, why it is a splendid time to workout! The first week or two back I am only going to do cardio to get my lungs and stamina back up. Then I will begin to mix in my free weights and whatnot. I used to be a semi-female-meathead back in the day and all about working out and fitness and the eating and physio behind that stuff. So I'm lucky to have an idea of what I am doing. It's just a matter of getting over my little I-don't-want-to-be-around-people-because-they-make-me-nervous-and-paranoid issue. I have the shoes, I have the yoga pants, and I have the sweatshirt. I also have neurosci lectures from MIT on my iPhone that I can listen to while I am on the elliptical. I also have put together my pumped up techno-house workout remixes of groovy songs that have 140+ beats per minute to keep me all motivated and shit. It's all planned... I just need to *do* it. I think I will. I will report back on my success. Logging on here will be my way to hold myself accountable and such. I hope! And on my phone apps. Yes. I CAN DO THIS!!!
Today I went and had me hairs did. Trim and highlight. After highlights for almost a year, I am nearing the light brown with a touch of blond on the top phase. I love it. It brightens my face, makes my face look fresher and thinner, and puts me in a good mood. I'll put a bit of a tan on and viola I'll be looking decent. The other day I went to the mall with my sister (don't ask how the hell that happened, and it probably won't for another 6 months because the mall is evil) and bought some jewelry, including rings, necklaces, and earrings. I'm all ready to totally girl myself out. It's kinda fun, and I do like doing it now and then, but I haven't because I have hated how I look. So here we go folks, the warmer weather is coming and I need to be comfortable showing a little bit of skin (like girly t-shirts) so that means I need to go and get my toned arms back. They were pretty and they are gone. So I will go find them again.
Hell yes.
I was depressed for a few days. Today driving into town to go to work I was elated for no particular reason. I also observed a total lack of social filter today and was a raving smart ass dick to a couple people that annoy me at work. Well one chick is a cashier and is generally a rude little bitch, so I can't be totally blamed for that one.
Bah. At any rate, it doesn't really matter.
So I'm on this thing to lose some weight. Yes there are those dudes that like a girl with a butt (thank you J Lopez, Beyonce, and the Kardashian family for making this shit popular). I am not such a big fan of the junk in my trunk. Therefore I am going to remove some of it and firm up the rest. I am tired of hating my body, I am tired of walking around in my body and hating my body, I am tired of having sex and hating my body, and I am tired of taking showers and hating my body.
Be the change you wish to see. It's my choice, I can sit on the sidelines and wish to be thinner, or I can actually do something about it. I'm going with the second option.
I might even keep track of my progress on here. Maybe. If I remember! I have a food app on my iPhone to log my eating stuffs, and fitness app to do log my workouts in. The problem I am facing is the part where I have to *start* going to the gym. I need a pre-gym. I use the gym on campus so I am generally surrounded by 18-22 year olds that have hung on to their teenage figure. Next to them, I feel worser. Yes, worser is a word. So I need to grow a pair and just do it. I may make tomorrow my first day. I have my neurosci class and then NOTHING, and this NOTHING, why it is a splendid time to workout! The first week or two back I am only going to do cardio to get my lungs and stamina back up. Then I will begin to mix in my free weights and whatnot. I used to be a semi-female-meathead back in the day and all about working out and fitness and the eating and physio behind that stuff. So I'm lucky to have an idea of what I am doing. It's just a matter of getting over my little I-don't-want-to-be-around-people-because-they-make-me-nervous-and-paranoid issue. I have the shoes, I have the yoga pants, and I have the sweatshirt. I also have neurosci lectures from MIT on my iPhone that I can listen to while I am on the elliptical. I also have put together my pumped up techno-house workout remixes of groovy songs that have 140+ beats per minute to keep me all motivated and shit. It's all planned... I just need to *do* it. I think I will. I will report back on my success. Logging on here will be my way to hold myself accountable and such. I hope! And on my phone apps. Yes. I CAN DO THIS!!!
Today I went and had me hairs did. Trim and highlight. After highlights for almost a year, I am nearing the light brown with a touch of blond on the top phase. I love it. It brightens my face, makes my face look fresher and thinner, and puts me in a good mood. I'll put a bit of a tan on and viola I'll be looking decent. The other day I went to the mall with my sister (don't ask how the hell that happened, and it probably won't for another 6 months because the mall is evil) and bought some jewelry, including rings, necklaces, and earrings. I'm all ready to totally girl myself out. It's kinda fun, and I do like doing it now and then, but I haven't because I have hated how I look. So here we go folks, the warmer weather is coming and I need to be comfortable showing a little bit of skin (like girly t-shirts) so that means I need to go and get my toned arms back. They were pretty and they are gone. So I will go find them again.
Hell yes.
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1 comments:
Do the weight control thing now, because the ability to lose weight is exponontially reduced by every decade. Otherwise, when you reach my age, the ability to lose weight is 32 time harder. I think it has something to do with Almond Joy deprivation as a child.;)
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