This past week has been strange. I've felt strange. Randomly feeling alone, panicked, scared, and generally freaked out for no reason. As though in my head I am peeking around every corner expecting to find danger or something bad there. Just freaked out. And fuzzy. And cannot concentrate that well. And tired a lot. Well the "tired" is probably from the freaked-out-ness and is my mind's way of hiding from it, so scratch that one.
I've done a splendid job of making an ass out of myself this week at work as well. It's super special. Between my torrents of anger and large helpings of giddy excitement, well I wouldn't be surprised if people half thought I was a nutter-butter. Fantastic.
School and all things academic that I thought I would accomplish over the summer has added to the freaked/strange feelings of late. I'm panicked. Scared. And all of the junk I already mentioned to the n'th degree. Sometimes it's hard to breathe when I think about it. Like now.
I put a request in for 10-14 days off from work as soon as I can get it. I'm hoping time off from daily stressors will help reboot my brain and get me to a fresh starting place in time for the fall semester. Not sure when it will be approved and my fingers are crossed that it will be soon. Really soon.
I'm frustrated. Kinda feel like I am sinking. Sick and tired of climbing up what seems like an endless cliff.
Dammit. I had hoped writing here would help the freaked-out feeling go away. But it is still here. I would love some lorazepam right now, but then I will fall asleep for sure and I need to be awake to study. Dammit dammit dammit.
I've done a splendid job of making an ass out of myself this week at work as well. It's super special. Between my torrents of anger and large helpings of giddy excitement, well I wouldn't be surprised if people half thought I was a nutter-butter. Fantastic.
School and all things academic that I thought I would accomplish over the summer has added to the freaked/strange feelings of late. I'm panicked. Scared. And all of the junk I already mentioned to the n'th degree. Sometimes it's hard to breathe when I think about it. Like now.
I put a request in for 10-14 days off from work as soon as I can get it. I'm hoping time off from daily stressors will help reboot my brain and get me to a fresh starting place in time for the fall semester. Not sure when it will be approved and my fingers are crossed that it will be soon. Really soon.
I'm frustrated. Kinda feel like I am sinking. Sick and tired of climbing up what seems like an endless cliff.
Dammit. I had hoped writing here would help the freaked-out feeling go away. But it is still here. I would love some lorazepam right now, but then I will fall asleep for sure and I need to be awake to study. Dammit dammit dammit.
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