Still the same; 200mg Lamictal just doesn't cut it. I can't keep a thought in my head and I'm ADD as frick. School work and studies? Ha. Yeah right. Well that's eff-ing fantastic really. Next Tues classes start, and my retarded self popped into graduate courses while I do my honors research thesis. All while I cannot stare at the same screen on my laptop without bouncing around... and forget about reading abilities. Let's face it, while I usually try to remain as positive as I possibly can about things, especially on here believe it or not (because actually typing the real bad stuff makes it permanent and in a way I don't want to give in and actually acknowledge the shitty feelings), so I'll be real for a sec... I'm not happy. Most of the time, not really. It's a struggle and more often than not I don't know what the hell I am struggling for. The point? Beats the shit out of me more often than not. But I'm a stubborn ass and won't quit. So instead I push myself and go half fucking bonkers in the process. I'm not making any sense right now. Nevermind.
I have bipolar disorder which is a total blast. No, I do not write in this blog for pity or to wallow in my troubles. I blog for two reasons: 1.) It is incredibly therapeutic for me since I don't talk to anyone face to face about these things, and 2.) my words sometimes help others who are rocking out with similar issues. Which is rad. I'm all about some teamwork here.
I'm not out on a mission to offend your delicate sensibilities. So if you don't like something I write, I suggest you pull the panties out of your bum and exit the blog. Nasty comments aren't cool, and they make me cry.