So it's been a hot minute since I last wrote on here. I've been busy. I've been good. I've been half nuts. I've been mostly total nuts. Above all I've been real damn busy.
I had the subject GRE in October and the regular (second time) early November. Amazingly enough, I did *worse* on the regular GRE the second time. That's been great for my confidence. The subject one wasn't anything to write home about. I was in the 80's, not 90's, percentiles. Which is pretty damn bad if you ask me. Another lift for my spirits.
Classes are over now, for sure. Finally. Just submitted my last essay exam for pharmacology. Waiting on grades at this point. Which is annoying. Fairly certain I have an A in the graduate neuroscience, I have an A in my research section, and pharmacology is likely to be an A as well because my scores for the first three exams have been 100, 94, and 100. I don't see why the fourth on will suck too bad. Graduate cognitive class, there's a special one. He only has two essay exams, one being the mid-term and the other the final. My mid term had two essays and I scored and A and an A-. He doesn't assign point values, so I'm not too sure how he weights the grades. The final had 3 questions... so my fingers are pretty much crossed for that crap.
There's been a helluvalot of stuff I've wanted to write, but I haven't for one reason or another. Mostly because I've been so busy, trying to cram everything in. I lived in the lab for a couple weeks while running subjects for my study. That wore my ass out. I'd work at 5:10a, then class after work, followed by being in the lab until at least 8p, often until 10p. Every freaking day. I live an hour out of town and it was a pain.
I swapped to a new store, which has been VERY special. Oh. My. Special. How the flying hell can people be so damn ridiculous?!?! I work with some very special people. I have no words to sum the situation up. It's borderline amazing.
I've been dipping into the 'lows' recently, which may come across in this post not exactly being cheerful. I'm trying. Trust me, I've already deleted a lot of crap I wanted to include but that I felt was too 'down' to type and have others read.
I ran out of the lamictal on Friday, and I'll get some more tomorrow. I'm sure med thing isn't helping my lows at the moment. But even with the lamictal, last week, I was going down hill, a little more each day. Stress and demands from work, school, grad school, you know, there's so much fucking shit and I cannot type the details without half flipping out in my head. And crying from frustration.
So I think I'm done with this post now. Sorry if I'm cranky. I'm really not happy. And stressed. And scared. And pretty much alone. And I've had some real eff'ed up nightmares, the vivid ones that stick with you during the day, and where I still feel the emotions from the dreams as though they really happened. NOT HELPING. At. All.
I had the subject GRE in October and the regular (second time) early November. Amazingly enough, I did *worse* on the regular GRE the second time. That's been great for my confidence. The subject one wasn't anything to write home about. I was in the 80's, not 90's, percentiles. Which is pretty damn bad if you ask me. Another lift for my spirits.
Classes are over now, for sure. Finally. Just submitted my last essay exam for pharmacology. Waiting on grades at this point. Which is annoying. Fairly certain I have an A in the graduate neuroscience, I have an A in my research section, and pharmacology is likely to be an A as well because my scores for the first three exams have been 100, 94, and 100. I don't see why the fourth on will suck too bad. Graduate cognitive class, there's a special one. He only has two essay exams, one being the mid-term and the other the final. My mid term had two essays and I scored and A and an A-. He doesn't assign point values, so I'm not too sure how he weights the grades. The final had 3 questions... so my fingers are pretty much crossed for that crap.
There's been a helluvalot of stuff I've wanted to write, but I haven't for one reason or another. Mostly because I've been so busy, trying to cram everything in. I lived in the lab for a couple weeks while running subjects for my study. That wore my ass out. I'd work at 5:10a, then class after work, followed by being in the lab until at least 8p, often until 10p. Every freaking day. I live an hour out of town and it was a pain.
I swapped to a new store, which has been VERY special. Oh. My. Special. How the flying hell can people be so damn ridiculous?!?! I work with some very special people. I have no words to sum the situation up. It's borderline amazing.
I've been dipping into the 'lows' recently, which may come across in this post not exactly being cheerful. I'm trying. Trust me, I've already deleted a lot of crap I wanted to include but that I felt was too 'down' to type and have others read.
I ran out of the lamictal on Friday, and I'll get some more tomorrow. I'm sure med thing isn't helping my lows at the moment. But even with the lamictal, last week, I was going down hill, a little more each day. Stress and demands from work, school, grad school, you know, there's so much fucking shit and I cannot type the details without half flipping out in my head. And crying from frustration.
So I think I'm done with this post now. Sorry if I'm cranky. I'm really not happy. And stressed. And scared. And pretty much alone. And I've had some real eff'ed up nightmares, the vivid ones that stick with you during the day, and where I still feel the emotions from the dreams as though they really happened. NOT HELPING. At. All.
Posts
0 comments:
Post a Comment